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Coping

Maintaining a Relationship Despite Depression

Dec 11, 2020
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Young couple hugging after a fight
  • Have fun outside of the relationship. Absence does make the heart grow fonder. Being around your partner all the time puts increased pressure on the relationship. Without separation and unique experiences, you may run out of topics of conversation. This causes the rut you are in to deepen. Social diversification is the ability to have many different social outlets. Otherwise, all of your eggs will be in one basket and depression puts holes in that basket. Going for a walk alone or spending time with friends or family will enable you to return to the relationship with some distance between you. You will have new information and experiences to communicate to each other.

When Enough Is Enough

Many times, a relationship is stronger than depression. Other times, the relationship cannot withstand the stress and weight of depression. It is a necessity that you begin to consider what you will not tolerate in a relationship before you are in that situation. Depression makes us hurt the ones around us in many ways. If you are hurting or being hurt, know your limits and decide when to leave.

Depression will want to keep you in relationships without chance of success. This way you remain depressed. Take an honest look at how the relationship works and if the poor relationship is the cause rather than the effect of the depression. If this is true, your depression or the depression of your partner will not have an opportunity to improve as long as the relationship continues. A sacrifice must be made.

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Walking away from someone with depression does not make you cold-hearted or a terrible person. It only makes you someone that can look objectively at the situation. Ending a poor relationship is not a failure. The only failure is staying in a relationship that has no hope of being happy, satisfying or loving.

Conclusion

Relationships are hard enough. Building trust, maintaining trust and weathering the storm of daily stressors is a troublesome path to follow for couples without depression. Being in a relationship where one or both people have depression presents a uniquely difficult challenge. If you work to decrease the bad, increase the good and know when to walk away, having a good relationship with depression is possible.

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Eric Patterson
Eric Patterson, LPC is a professional counselor in western Pennsylvania working for the last 10 years to help children, teens and adults achieve their goals and live happier lives. Read more about Eric and his writing at www.ericlpattersonwriting.com. See all of Eric's articles
More Articles by Eric
Resources
  • Healthline (Depression in Relationships: When to Say Goodbye)
  • Verywellmind (Tips for Coping With Depression in a Relationship)
  • Bridges to Recovery (Severe Depression and Relationships: How to Redirect Self-Doubt and Criticism)
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