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Tips for Helping a Loved One With Depression

Nov 26, 2014
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Helping Someone With Depression

Has someone special in your life been acting differently?  Does she seem down and more lethargic?  Has she been staying in bed more and missing days of school or work?  It could be that the special person in your life has signs and symptoms of depression.

This answer leads to more questions as you ask yourself: What can I do about it?  Depression seems overwhelming and scary at times.  You have of heard terrible things happening to people with depression.  Your fear is becoming the enemy.

9 Tips to Help with Depression

The truth is that if your intentions are pure and you practice appropriate boundaries as a friend, family member or spouse, helping someone with depression can be easier than you think.  As long as you establish depression as the enemy, you can find success.  Following all or some of tips below will help you be more understanding and efficient in helping someone with depression.  Here’s how:

  • Come from a place of love. Being a support means that your intentions are driven only by the desire to help a loved one in your life.  Coming from a place of love means that you work to provide a solid understanding of your loved one’s situation to better help.  If you find your motivations being less than altruistic, you may want to back away.  Don’t choose to help someone because you think that you can obtain a reward or secondary benefit.  Don’t invest time in your loved one because it will be a distraction from your own hardships.  If love is not your motivation, these tips will not work and you should leave the assistance to someone else.
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  • Set a goal. If love is your motivation, set a goal.  What is it you want to help your loved one accomplish?  The goal will serve as a direction and a course of action for you to follow.  Do you want to help your loved one admit that depression has become a strong, negative influence in her life?  Do you want to help her in cleaning her home?  Do you want to make her happier?  Avoid goals that are too broad or hard to measure.  If you want your loved one to be “happier,” it will be difficult to tell when this is accomplished.  This leads to frustration and anger.  Set small goals that are easy to attain and then set another.
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Eric Patterson
Eric Patterson, LPC is a professional counselor in western Pennsylvania working for the last 10 years to help children, teens and adults achieve their goals and live happier lives. Read more about Eric and his writing at www.ericlpattersonwriting.com. See all of Eric's articles
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